Tuesday, October 15, 2013

The Spoken Unspoken

Caution:  This may be offensive.  Read with caution, or don't read at all if you are sensitive.  This is my opinion.


The only way I can think of how to begin this topic is by sounding like a bad, stand-up comic. And it's not even close to funny. I apologize in advance.

So what's the deal with the unspoken prayer request?

I have a problem with this.  If it is such a sensitive, secretive topic, then pray for it without the announcement that you have one.  If you honestly do not think you can share it with a group of people, then don't.  If it is a request that is burdensome enough to share with fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, then actually say what it is.

I liken this to a child who is supposed to keep a secret.  A true secret-keeper will act as if he or she has no knowledge of the secret.  But as all parents have experienced, the first time you tell your child a secret, he has to advertise that he knows something that others do not know.  This advertisement, this announcement of the secret knowledge, is too revealing.  In essence, it is no longer a complete secret once people know that there is one being kept.

In both examples, I think it boils down to the same root issue.  The child who is announcing he has the secret and the person who has to speak about the unspoken request are both doing so out of pride.

Pride.  "This is so important, this information I am privy to, that I can't share it with anyone."  "This very personal issue is so private, that I can't tell you about it."  "But that doesn't mean you can't 'pray' about this thing you don't know about.  Because God knows."

It's true that God knows.  It's also true that none of the rest of us have to know about it.  If it is wise to not share specifics about the request, then don't.  But don't tell me that you have something that can't be shared.  It's childish.  It's prideful.  It's unwise.

Is it really God-honoring to share an unspoken request?  Request sharing is not a time for gossip, pride, etc.  It's a time that "me toos" can be shared, to use an idea from Clive Staples.  It should be a time of honesty, authenticity, and brokenness between like-minded, sinning disciples of Christ.  Perhaps the sinning saints are hurting because we are sojourners, and living in a hostile world brings trouble. ("In this world you will have trouble," Jesus warned.)  Perhaps the purpose is based in praise (alliteration not intentional), and we see a piece of home here on earth because loving God and loving others will bring blessing.  Perhaps we share to adore the One who is redeeming us for a greater purpose.

But if you feel it's best not to share, and sometimes I think that is wise, then shut-up.

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